What's the difference between my father and my mother. My father isn't an alcoholic

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what did the robot say to the black guy? I'LL BE BACK

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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a kid was running across the street. he just got hit by a truck

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What did the white man say to the black man that sneezed? -Bless you.

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Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

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A drunk guy walks into a bar. He orders a beer and the bartender says "Hey pal, you look and act really drunk, I don't think I can serve you any more alcohol." The man looks up to the bartender and says "You're right, I'm really drunk."

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Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

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how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

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what do call a car full of people on the side of the road? a cool explosion waiting to happen

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Why did the man go to the hospital Because he was hurt

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If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

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Why did the teacher get mad at the student? Because he ran over him with a car.

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Whats worse then a hundred dead babies? One trying to eat its way out.

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What do Vladimir Putin and a snake have in common? A central nervous system, to name but one of the many biological similarities.

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when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

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A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 1027

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A man walks into a grab and go restaurant and asks the man if he can stay, the man replies "yes."

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Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

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The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops