Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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Adolf the Red-Nosed Hitler

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem makes no sense refrigerator.

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My name is Corey, and I am Dickbang Majestic. Q: Who is Dickbang Majestic? A: Corey is.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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What did Pablo experience during his first day in private school? the atmosphere of a private school

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A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

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hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

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A spatial closet situates trolls beside the whistle.

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What is worse than getting stung by a wasp? Getting raped by a sexually frustrated bear.

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What do you call a black fire-fighter? A hero.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

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What do you call a flying Jew? Smoke

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Why did the man kill himself? Because he had a gun

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Finally, lets take the fight two the streets shall we, no I am not asking, asking is for pussies: YOU VIOLATED AND KILLED MY FATHER! YES YES WHAT IS IT WITH YOU WOMEN ANYWAYS I VIOLATED YOUR MOTHER TOO, BUT YOU DON`T HEAR HER WHINING ABOUT IT! In fact tell her to stop her sending me nude shots, I prefer it when she sends me those she takes of you in your sleep... Your friendly Neighborhood R*pist Moral Man:The day Moral Man graced your village was the worst day of your life, for me it was fathers day! Literally, do you really think I killed your father? I would never comitt suicide! Now, let us celebrate our reunion with some... "Moral WINcest" Barlog: Yes we would like to see the tapes you made for me banging her mother. two Super Turbo edition hours later: YEEEEEEEEEEES! YEEEEEEEEEEEES!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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