How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb?

Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

Where did the banana go? -Nowhere, a banana can't walk.,

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

Vote this down and get DOXED

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

why didn't Marlin monroe ( http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe ) use the iphone app guitar hero because she died before the iphone was invented !

Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

Getting an STD. What's worse than mixing up the order of the joke and the punchline?

10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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