Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

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knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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When Life Gives You Melons... You're Probably Dyslexic.

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why was six afraid of seven? seven was a sex offender

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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How do you scare a black man? Burn his house down.

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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these jokes are not funny but there funny because there not funny aaaaaaaa pissing me off

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Knock knock Who's there? The bank. We've come to evict you from your house.

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Q: What happened to the man who died? A: Nothing, there is no afterlife.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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a man walked in to a bar and said 'outch'

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If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

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Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

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What's endangered like the Spotted Owl? A Cancer patient.

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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What happened to thepeanut who went to NYC? He was assulted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops