Roses are red, Violets are blue, Today I'll wear a hat on my head Instead of a shoe.

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

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Roses are red, Bacon is brown, this poem makes no sence, BACON!!

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what do u call a black persons face? a black persons face...

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whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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A Mormon walks into a bar

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I may have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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What you you call peanut butter on the top of a dog house Peanut butter

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A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

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What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

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why did the chicken cross the street i dont know thats why im asking you

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An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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Everything's looking fine, ma'am. Hope to see you again real soon.

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What do you call a man running away from the bus? A man

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What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes?

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Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

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the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

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Why was the homeless man lying on the floor? Because he was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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