Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

Nero here, nice to see you guys again, now you know why my babbling has been excessive (and pissed at the comments below, but now that the pills are working I am calm) Anyway, yeah point Zero is my "world" now, and its been thriving under my values (something I feared would just work on paper, and if so such beliefs would all been for nothing) As for hero... Well insert something like "I am no hero, I just do what is right" or something cheesy, or... Well, thats what I do really... Since nobody uses this site Ill extend the time you "former followers" can chat, as I got some nice stuff to share, and might just share a bit before I pass away (nah, but I will sleep when tired), I got a lot to do tomorrow.

How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? the redneck got to him first.

69

What's sad about three black men in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? They were my friends.

What group of people do the police target? Criminals.

Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

Why did the Black man buy some slaves? They were his family

Yo mama is so fat when she went to the fat contest they said SORRY no pros alowed

How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer, then you will die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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