Wait! hundred billions!

knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

What's black and dangerous? A fridge, I lied about the black part.

A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

knock knock no no you go now i clean

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? - Because it died.

The movie starts off with Tom Cruz jumping out of a plane. He hits the ground and dies, end of movie. - Cole G.

Why did the man fall of his bicycle? Because someone threw a fridge at him

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

Moon: The sun shines bright like a virgin. He must be high..

Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

2 Priests and a Monk walk into a bar, All 3 were stabbed to death in a bar fight.

What do you call a black kid with no parents? A black orphan.

Why did the black guy stop drinking his kool-aid? He learned of its high sugar content and began to drink a glass of water as a healthier option.

why do jews like weed? A) because they are used to being baked.

Why did the Muslim kill a gay guy? Because the gay guy was threatening his family with a gun.

What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

Q: Holy do you get a nun pregnant? A: You have sexual intercourse with her, and have an orgasm inside her body. Also, in vitro fertilization is a viable, albeit expensive, alternative for couples who have difficulty conceiving by standard intercourse.

I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

A man walked into a bar Ouch!

dont be afraid of lard squeezing cause really its just me teasing

What do you get when you stab Al with a sword? At

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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