Knock knock. Who's there? Screw! Screw who? Screw you.

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your mommas so stupid she has trouble doing things an average person would manage easily

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What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

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Why did the black man kill his girlfriend? Because it was his mom!

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once opon a time. never mind i'm just going to beat you kids.

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Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

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Knock, knock who's there? Steve Evans. Steve Evans who? You've already forgotten me? We just met on Eharmony yesterday.

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Dont read this joke

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A duck walks into a doctor's office. Quack.

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Whats Funnier than the Holacaust? A: Nothing you asshole!

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Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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Lard and Liz lard,lard and Liz

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Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

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what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

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Why did the woman pay $5,000 for a gallon of milk? She didn't. She paid $2.99.

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How many jews does it take to change a baby's diper? I don't know my wife will do it.

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once upon a time a guy thought he wrote an original anti joke but it wasnt

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You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

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What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? An effect of an overcrowded theme park

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A duck walks into a bar. He sees Khloe Kardashian sitting on a barstool. The duck runs out of the bar screaming.

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Where is the center of the universe? There is no center of the universe! According to the standard theories of cosmology, the universe started with a "Big Bang" about 14 thousand million years ago and has been expanding ever since. Yet there is no center to the expansion; it is the same everywhere. The Big Bang should not be visualised as an ordinary explosion. The universe is not expanding out from a center into space; rather, the whole universe is expanding and it is doing so equally at all places, as far as we can tell. In 1929 Edwin Hubble announced that he had measured the speed of galaxies at different distances from us, and had discovered that the farther they were, the faster they were receding. This might suggest that we are at the center of the expanding universe, but in fact if the universe is expanding uniformly according to Hubble's law, then it will appear to do so from any vantage point. If we see a galaxy B receding from us at 10,000 km/s, an alien in galaxy B will see our galaxy A receding from it at 10,000 km/s in the opposite direction. Another galaxy C twice as far away in the same direction as B will be seen by us as receding at 20,000 km/s. The alien will see it receding at 10,000 km/s:

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What's worse than being raped? Not a whole lot-- rape is a very serious mental and emotional strain that will stick with a person for the remainder of their life.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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