how do you get a black guy out of a tree? fried chicken.

How do you make an elf sad? Murder his family.

Whats green and fuzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

a man walks into a desert Obama is there to greet him and they have a nice chicken dinner

A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

How do you kill a polar bear? Global Warming.

What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

White men's rights

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

how many black guys goes it take to screw inalightbulb? just one, but inalightbulb was feeling rather slutty today, so 2.

Knock Knock whos there? Semore Frickelson Semore Frickelson Who? What other Semore Frickelson do you know!? Let me in its freezing out here!

What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

Me

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

Johnny had 100 chocolate bars. He ate 95 and gave 3 to his friend. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes

Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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