how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

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Knock Knock! Who's there? It's Jim. Jim who? I'm your son, Jim. Are you losing your memory?

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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Whats an Anit-joke?? A joke that possesses the kind of humor based on the surprise factor of absence of an expected joke or of a punch line in a narration which is set up as a joke.

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Q:Why is the WMBA so unsuccessful? A:Barely anyone watches it

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

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Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house, she feels bad about herself but is too embarrassed to get a gym membership and work-out in public.

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

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Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

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where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

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What would you do if your penis disintegrated? Never mate again.

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what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

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my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

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Haikus are easy But they don't always make sense. Refrigerator.

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How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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Yo momma so fat she couldn't even fit in a house

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Why does beonce say to the left, to the left. she doesnt she sings it.

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whats the difference between ian bothom and david gower? shredded wheat.

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Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

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why dont you ever run over a black guy thats on a bike? because you will be sewed and also probably have the shit kicked out of you

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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