what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

Roses are Green Violets are Black Everything's different since I took crack

Republicans

Steven Hawking walks into a bar

Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

What do you call a black man with pearl white teeth ? A man with good dental hygiene.

a girl got a friend request from a unknown guy. she chated him asking who he was. he replied vamos a tener sexo caliente y vas a pedir mas rapido mas duro! vamos ser estrellos porno. the girl deleted him as a friend B.A.

What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

Why couldnt dylan make it to mike's birthday party? He was killed instantly in a car crash on the way there.

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face Horse: I'm dying of an incurable cancer...

What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

what do you do when you forget to do your math homework? kill your teacher

what is red and lies on the floor? the boy that jumped out of the plane

sky's sty

Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

hi i'm a dick, i mean mitt romney

No because your face is really f***** up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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