Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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What did the waiter say to an overweight customer? May I take your order?

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once upon a time, it snowed

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What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

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roses are black, violets are black, im dead.

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A child walks into a classroom.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Tie her down and plant a bamboo seed under her.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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Add William Wright on facebook Answer-www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

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How do you get a priest out of a tree? Throw a canoe at him.

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What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

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Three women are seen walking while having ice cream. One of them is licking the ice cream. Another is sucking the ice cream, and the other one is biting the ice cream. One of these women is married. Which one is married? The one that has a wedding ring on her finger.

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I agree Detroit sux. But the bulls suk too ya know

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Guess what? Bananas

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Yo momma is so ugly that she uses it as motivation to work hard and thus for achieve more than a lot of whores do

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarter ever (this isn't a joke just a true statement)

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Q: Human being? A: False. Jew.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. But if you answered poop you aren't wrong.

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Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

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if a fat guy in a red suit comes into your house on christmas. its not santa your about to get raped from chewy(:

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What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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