what did the fart say to the butt........bye

What do you do when a sing is stuck inside your head? Put a gun to your head, and shoot the song to death. It will work. Trust me. Youll never hear the song again. Or anything again.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

What did little John get for his birthday? No sort of disease or illness of any kind because he was in perfect health. He also got an Xbox.

what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

Why are black people so tall? Jesus was also black and therefore gives black people some favorable traits.

Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

What's the difference between Wayne Gretzky and Courtney Love? They have different proffesions

You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

Who didn't let the gorilla into the ballet? The people who were in charge of that decision.

Your mother is so fat, she is dying due to obesity and it would be utterly disgusting to make fun of anyone in that situation.

How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

once upon a time, it snowed

Why did the man stop playing his computer game? The SWAT busted down his door and quickly pinned him down and arrested him for the murder of 7 families, he was charged for life in prison.

How many cans does the average alcoholic drink in one night? None. Cans are solid and therefore cannot be drank.

What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

Every 60 seconds In Africa......... A minute passes.

what did charlie sheen do when his ex wife insulted him? he horribly abused her

What did the waiter say to an overweight customer? May I take your order?

Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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