Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

Yo momma's so fat, however, she takes pride in her size because every body is beautiful.

What was that pirate movie rated? PG-13

Did you know Hellen Keller had a swingset? No I didn't. Ya it was actually really nice.

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

"Doctor, Doctor! I feel like I'm a dinner roll!" Yes, well that's a side effect of your brain cancer.

Q. What did the toothbrush say to the toothpaste A. Nothing you idiot there inanimate objects they can't talk

One I grabbed a lump of coal, and crushed it with such strength, that a human being was born out of it. That man is today known as Chuck Norris. Nero.

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A.One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a human.

Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

How do you make a Bong Ki mad? Call him a Bong Ki.

What's the difference between a taxidermist and an astronomer ? They have a different job.

Yo Mamma's so dumb... She cannot manage to find a decent job without her GED.

What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

What's black, white, and red all over? Something that's black, white, and red all over.

Why did the dyslexic chicken cross the toad? Because the toad mocked his dyslexia, and the chicken does not tolerate rude bastard toads.

What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

Whats funnier than a black guy dieing? Everything thats not funny

Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

Why are there so many jokes about germans on Anti-Joke? Because the Germans epitomize the flavour of anti-jokes perfectly and they have the whole nazi history thing going on which is ripe ground for many an anti-joke

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set in her backyard? Neither did she.

How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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