Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 went to a house party. 7 was there. 7 and 6 kind of new each other. They went to the same school, but weren`t really friends. All night 7 was giving 6 strange looks. 6 started feeling uneasy, so he left the party early. When 6 got in his car 7 was inside waiting for him and pulled out a gun. Luckily 6 got away from 7 safely, but has been scared of him ever since.

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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A man walks into a bar... And orders a glass of beer to cool himself off after a long day at the quarry.

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Yo mamma so fat when I searched her on the internet, I got 28,000,000 results

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What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

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If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

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'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

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A man and his friend go hunting,one falls in a hole and appears dead. The friend calls 911 and asks what to do, the operator says ok first we need to make sure he's dead. The friend checks his pulse and finds out he is living, then an ambulance is sent and the hunter lives with minor injuries.

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What do you do when a blonde falls up an elevator? Pray, and hope Jesus will take you as well. Just kidding, Jesus isn't real.

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Yo momma's so ugly. Most people do not enjoy looking at her

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What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

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Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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A black man, a small child, and a priest were all standing in line. They were all checking in the hospital after being in a 3 car pileup

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the next joke.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw him

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When life hands me beef, I make lemon stew.

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Q: What do you call a black man's car being egged? A: A Hate Crime

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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