what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your dog pooped on my lawn Now my violets are even more blue

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What starts with P and ends with "oop" POOP

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There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

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One time, I called the police, but it was actually a fire. So my neighbors died.

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Q: Guess what my Mom and Dad did last Night on the Kitchen Table.... A: Had Dinner.

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what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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What do you call a black man with no legs? Crippled.

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A man walks into a bar, he says ouch.

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whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

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Why did the sheep cry? Because it contracted cancer

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

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What did the man say when his wife said hello? Hello.

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Q: Why did the baby cry when it came out of the moms stomach? A: The doctor dropped it!

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

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One time at band camp.............tha'ts it........

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My mom so fat, when she jumps gravity pushed her away from the ground

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What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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