I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Worth more points.

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What do two black guys do when they walk into the convienent store with masks? Buy candy for Trick-or-Treating

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

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What did the man say when he lost his phone? Answer: I lost my phone!!

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Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

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How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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ewrg

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Hats better than a stick? A stone

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What is worse than going to school? Nothing.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A Pilot.

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What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

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what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

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Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

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A chicken decides to cross a road. Unfortunately it gets ran over and does. The end.

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Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops