Why did the man lose the poker match in the jungle? He was playing a cheetah.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worst than dropping your watch into the gutter? Waking up with a penis on your head.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock. *silence* Knock Knock.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man removed Stephen Hawkings hand off his keyboard, what did Stephen say to the man? Nothing his hand isnt on the keyboard.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

? The person who made that "joke" down there has no life ?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why hasn't little Johnny ever had a clown at his birthday party? Johnny is an underprivileged Hispanic member of the community.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the baby's bedroom smell so bad? The mom farted.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Cancer. Super Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A little boy who was sleeping in his parent's bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't. He said nothing, and the incident troubled him deeply for many years.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

kk

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What was the weather like at the rap concert?there was a lil wayne.I DID A FUNNY! !!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man walks into a bar. On impact, he suffers quite the blow to his head, resulting in him falling unconscious. He is escorted to the hospital, where he is pronounced in a coma on arrival. His family is left devastated. His wife, who was a stay-at-home mother to their 2 children doesn't take this news very well and is sent into a spiraling depression. 16 years later, the man finally wakes from his coma to find that his son and daughter that he had left behind where now grown teenagers and almost done with high school, his wife's has remarried and given birth to his half-child. This is why you don't text while walking down a sidewalk.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo' momma is so fat, that- Wait. Sorry. Too far?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: How to make a man who suffers from hypochondria want to kill himself? A: You take a shet on his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your mother is so ugly that I removed her from my friends list on Facebook.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops