A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

What do you call a 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor.

BBW BABY IS THE BEST BETTER THAN THE REST WELL EXCEPT MILF BABY. SUBSCRIBE TO BigHDGuns

Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

knock knock. who's there. gestapo.

what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

Why did Bob fall over? He was impaled by a narwhal. -BG

Once upon a time, a duck named Jim went to work, he went up to the steps to his new job and and he was paid all day to sit in a hot tub. Little did he know it was a boiling pot and he was served at Christmas dinner

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

What do you call a half-Latino, half-Asian baby? The product of a healthy interracial couple.

Q. whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A. A jew is a human of the jewish religion, and a pizza is food.

I like touching my boobs

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

why did the chicken cross the road? i have no idea, i dont know what goes on in a chicken's brain. the better question would be why was a chicken loose in a city

A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

Dig a big hole in your front yard and wait next to it so when people walk by they'll ask "Why is there a hole in your front yard?" to whcih you will reply "I don't know. Do you wanna play Monopoly?"

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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