What's the same between grapes and squirrels? They're both purple, except for the squirrel.

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

Roses are red, Violets are violet, hence the name Violets.

two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

What's red and smells like metal? A tricycle. It's covered in blood.

What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

what did the policeman say to an armed robber? you can go, as long as you don't hurt my doughnuts

How do you drown a blonde. Put a Scratch N Sniff at the bottom of a pool and tell her to sniff it.

how doyou wake up lady gaga youu poke er face

The elephant moonwalked. On the moon.

One day a there was a guy walking down the street. If you thought this was a joke, you're wrong.

What did the lawyer name is daughter? Caroline, in honor of his grandmother who died in THe Holocaust.

A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

which one is easiest

A psychotic man walks into a pharmacy He buys his weekly medication to control his condition.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding half of regis philbin in your apple...

Bob: If two negatives make a positive, what would be an anti-anti-joke? Tim: An anti-joke

What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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