What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

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What do you call Morgan Freeman at a family reunion? Morgan Freeman.

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What's white and horny? a unicorn.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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Once upon a time

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how do you call a big red creature eating rocks? the big red rock eating creature.

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Pianos.

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why was the old man on the ground he fell

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Knock knock Who's there? NYPD you are being placed under arrest come out with your hands up.

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Q. What's the best thing to do before you get in a car accident? A. There's actually not much you can do in a car accident, considering you probably will never expect it, and it happens relatively too fast to react.

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how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

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Q: What do you do when you see a man with no arms and no legs walking down the street? A: You wonder how the hell he is walking

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I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

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24

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How many police officers does it take to secure 3 hooded black men? However many police are on duty.

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a white men said to another white men that someone robbed a bank, it was at night and he wasn't wearing a mask, and also the camera couldn't see him, they now found out that he was black.

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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Adolf the Red-Nosed Hitler

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Bin laden walks into a bar oh wait he's dead.

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The first few weeks of joining weight-watchers...you're just finding your feet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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