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Adolf the Red-Nosed Hitler

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

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How many police officers does it take to secure 3 hooded black men? However many police are on duty.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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Pianos.

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Knock knock Who's there? NYPD you are being placed under arrest come out with your hands up.

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why was the old man on the ground he fell

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how do you call a big red creature eating rocks? the big red rock eating creature.

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Once upon a time

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how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

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Q. What's the best thing to do before you get in a car accident? A. There's actually not much you can do in a car accident, considering you probably will never expect it, and it happens relatively too fast to react.

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Q: What do you do when you see a man with no arms and no legs walking down the street? A: You wonder how the hell he is walking

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Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

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Bin laden walks into a bar oh wait he's dead.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

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The first few weeks of joining weight-watchers...you're just finding your feet.

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what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

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What do you call Morgan Freeman at a family reunion? Morgan Freeman.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops