Why did the elderly lady cross the road? Because an atomic bomb was exploding behind her

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Whats the difference between a black man and a picnic table? Alot of things

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How was Charles Manson able to get women to kill for him? Because he was charismatic and intelligent.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

There once was a man from Nantucket. He decided to sail to Portland. He cast off and was never seen again.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did Charlie do when he lost his golden ticket? He killed his grandpa to get it back.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -12

the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Right now I'm walking down a road shoot car rhendhhdgfgdyxchdhsggggggggggggggggggggggggg

thumb_up thumb_down -12

To men walk into a bar. One says to a paying customer, "Mind if I sit here?" and the other man inquires the bartender about so.e fancy drink that takes five minutes to prepare. After 23 minutes, naturally, they left at exactly the same time and they went home to their wife and kids. They both share a wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's a fun place to visit on the weekend? Uranus.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happens when a right turn is finally made in NASCAR? The driver has successfully changed his tires and has been refueled, now he is pulling out of pit lane.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse. The horse walks out of the bar kicking over some chairs and scaring some people because he is a horse and horses do not belong in public atmospheres.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what happens when you put nina and harry in the same room. Nina will die instantly of shock

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Jesus, Buddha and Mohamed walked into a bar and say: "There is as much validity in this fiction as in our collective works.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the frog say to the goat? Nothing frogs can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops