Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

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What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

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What did the giraffe say to the walrus? Nothing. Giraffes can't talk. What did the Scotsman say to the walrus? Nothing. Scotsmen can't talk.

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Henry was struck by a train. He was mourned by his parents.

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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Q: What do you call cheese that's not your own? A: Someone else's cheese

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Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

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What is white And taste like sheep A sheep

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What the hell are you doing?

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who looks like justin bieber and is really cool? george darling but i lied about him being cool.

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Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

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Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

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- Hi, my name is Sarah Lennon. - Wow! Are you related to Sarah Palin?!

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what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

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what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

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Why was the little boy crying? Because he had an undescended testicle

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Why did the black man repeatedly punch the white man? The two men were boxers. They were fighting in a charity boxing match. Revenue generated by the event went towards cancer research.

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So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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