A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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How many unicorns does it take to change a lightbulb? Unicorns do not use lightbulbs, their technology (magic) is way too advanced to waste fossil fuels and pollute the air. Also, you can't change a lightbulb with hooves. ;)

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How do you make a plumber mad? You tell him that his princess is in another castle about a thousand times over 25 years.

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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What did one theoretical physicist say to another theoretical physicist? Hey there Bill, how's Nancy and the kids doing?

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh wait i think i missed the joke, what?

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I worship you Nero, and I wont even begin to explain myself why.

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why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

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Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

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Q: What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not struggling with a debilitating mental or physical handicap.

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What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

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How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

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A: Knock, knock. B: Who's there? The writer of this joke had no idea how to end this.

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What did Queen Victoria say when she saw a zombie? "Quick everybody, run, that is a zombie."

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Why did the girl have an abortion? Because she wanted a burger.

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Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

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Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

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Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

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Whats worse than one beast thing? Two beast things. Whats worse than two beast things? The holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust? Three beast things.

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I like to thumb up my own jokes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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