roses are red, violets are blue when ever l flush the toilet i think of you

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

A boy with red hair is happy.

Do knock-knock jokes apply to homeless people?

Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

What do you call a big hungry duck? A duck thats hungry and big

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

What word rhymes with orange? -Adult onset diabetes

The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

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When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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