- Anti Joke

What do you call a black priest? Holy s***

Why couldn't Lucy get her driver's license? Because she has Cerebral Palsy!

What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Getting voted down to page 4067

darude- sandstorm

Knock knock, Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana Smith, I'm here for the Smith Family Reunion.

Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

whats worse than a leaf in your bed? World hunger, global warming, the economy......

Two guys walk into a bar. This is really exciting as they haven't seen each other for two years and are looking forward to catching up.

Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: The Police. We have a warrant for your arrest.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a headache OUCH!

What were Benjamin Franklin's first words after he died? It's been 225 years and we still don't know yet.

What's worst than dropping your watch into the gutter? Waking up with a penis on your head.

What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

Where did the girl go after the explosion? Everywhere

Friends are like snow; they disappear when you pee on them.

What has potential but is in fact disappointing? This joke.

Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

roses are red violets are blue i done you mom a favor by making you...banana and rice don't worry it'll taste just nice

Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Seriously, all your new jokes are shit. They are either repeats of stuff previously on the site or they are just so unfunny you'd struggle to get a sympathy laugh from your mother. Please actually take the time to think of something worth submitting or do not submit at all. We know people with no arms can't knock on doors enough now, and many things are better than the holocaust. Do something new!

Little Jack Horner sat in a corner eating a Christmas pie. He died the next morning because it was Easter and the pie had remained unrefrigerated since the holidays. His parents were brought up on charges of neglegent homocide. Plus, they had a meth lab in the guest bathroom and ran a prostituion ring off of Craig's list. Jack's sister is now in the care of loving foster parents,who plan on adopting her and she misses her brother. Easter is a sad reminder of her former life, even though she is now a devout Christian and acknowledges the day as that of our Lord's ressurection. She plans on going to college to study nursing, someday.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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