Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

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How long does it take you to count to 5? 5 seconds.

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Knock Knock Who's There? The I.R.S.

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What do you call a handsome nerd? The name that is on his birth certificate.

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what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

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Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

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Roses are red, violets are blue, so is my face, I'm constipated

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the sky is green no it is not

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An alphabet walks into the post office and asks for a letter. What does the postal worker give the alphabet? Nothing. Alphabets can't walk.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? Quite obviously, still quizzical, being that tests are just longer, harder quizzes.

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how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

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karn chevalier

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What do you get if you put a lepper in front of a fan A mess

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two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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What brown and sticky? A sticky turd

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they are run over by a steam roller? Dead

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How do you get Vladamir Putin to smile? You tickle him.

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why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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