A man walks into a bar. There is no one there.

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Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

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What happened to the convict on death row? He died

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What the difference between a mexican family and a bench? The bench can support the family

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Shea's sty....

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender served him a beer and said "why the long face?", to which the horse replied "neigh". The bartender was later fired for incompetence and serving beer to a horse.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve her because she is not yet 21.

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yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

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Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

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Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

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You know what's a joke? Something Funny

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do,Nt loagh at me I has dislecqsia

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Whats pink red and silver? A baby chewing on reason blades. Whats pink red silver and smells bad? Same baby two weeks later.

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What did the unicorn eat for a snack? Nothing. Unicorns are a majestic fiction animal.

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What was Mozart's favorite vegetable? Aspara-gus.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

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What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops