Why can't jokes spit?

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because his weekend was busy!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

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Q: In 2900 A.D, why did the stars started blasting at each other and exploding? A: Because it was the time for "Star Wars".

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How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

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When geese fly in the "V" shape, why is one side longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the government, your home is being repossessed.

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Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

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69

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want to hear a yo mama joke sure Your dad

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What is the difference between an empty bucket and a bucket of water? The Water.

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Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

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Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

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What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

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what do you call ten white people on a bench ten white people sitting on a bench, possibly eating their lunch

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Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

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Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing he died.

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A man gets pushed in to a pole...

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Want to hear the funniest joke in the world? I forget how it goes but it ends with the abolishment of slavery.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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