Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

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Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

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Please give money to a local Jew we have had such a bad time please ONLY people who are Jews.

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three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

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How do you spot a paedophile in a playground? You don't, there are usually a lot of adults around.

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Once i was walking down the street when i saw a homeless man As i leant to give him money he jumped up and stabbed me. Now i don't approach drunk strangers with hangovers

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roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

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i like men but im not gay

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

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What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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Dyslexics are teople poo

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

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What has hands but isn't alive? A dead person.

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why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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Why do Mexican's wear pointy shoes? Because its part of their culture and is used as a sign of dignity when dancing to tribal music

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emma: mat has a quick reaction time

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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