What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

What happens when you poke a ghost that is on the edge of a building?? Ghost aren't real, so therefor you will fall of the building and die????

why did the chinken cross the rode? why? to get to the gay persons house. Knock, Knock. Who's there. the chicken.

Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

Why is three afraid of four? Because four ate five.

One night, I walked into a bar. I ordered a few drinks, and left later that night.

Did you hear about the Pole who studied for 5 days?

what did the elephant step on when he was running through the jungle? .... a coke machine.

Knock knock Who's there? Illiteracy.

What is faster? A mustang or a corvette? A fighter jet you stupid idiotic piece of crap!

If you give a man a fish, he'll eat it.

why is 6 scared of 7? because 7 eight 9

what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

What did batman say to robin before getting into the bat mobile? Don't touch my penis.

Do you know what is worse than getting kicked downstairs? Getting kicked upstairs because then you could fall downstairs and break your skull.

tomatoe tomato my toe is named tom

An unarmed man robbed a bank today, he failed because he had no way of carrying the cash out.

Jack and Jill went up the hill. Jill was dehydrated.

Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

Who's on first? Garvey.

What do you call a black man with a speech impediment? By his name.

Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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