Whats the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? Dead babies are not sports cars

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Q: What has the exact same colors as the gay flag but are sometimes hilarious? A: Clowns.

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why did Rebecca black get down on Fridays? because she had school every other day of the week.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Where it had just witnessed a horrific car accident involving it's spouse, who died on impact. Eventually the chicken fell into a deep depression, taking it out on his children in the form of physical abuse. Over time, the chicken ended up being alone, having no contact with his kids, having no friends, and living in a massive house with no one else. One day, he had a stroke, and no one called an ambulance because no one knew.

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? It didn't. Anyone who would believe that is a complete moron.

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Roses are red, pink, white or yellow. Stop stereotyping my arrogant fellow.

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What did the Frog say to the other Frog? Nothing they can't speak

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Why did Timmy stay home on the day of the big test at the public school? He was homeschooled

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A black guy and an apple fall out of a tree, which one hits the ground first? They both hit the ground roughly at the same time, because the acceleration due to gravity is constant.

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Why was the baker rich? Because he had a lot of money

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how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

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Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What is invisible and smells like cheese? Cheese. I lied about the invisible part, because cheese is not invisible.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Getting raped..

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What did god say when he saw the first black person? He will do alright for him self

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In the movie, Full Metal Jacket, my favorite part was when the entire platoon beat PVT. Pyle with hard soap while he was tied down. Actually I am lying. That part was extremely cruel.

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When god hands you lemons .. you find a new god.

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Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

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Q: Why didn't Jane cross the road? A: Because Jane is a figment of my imagination and therefore has neither the physical capability to cross this so called "road" nor the initiatory motivation to do so...

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean? Dead.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well, you should, if only for the cultural experience.

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Knock, knock -The door's open.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops