What's green and has wheels? Weed. I lied about the wheels.

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Knock, Knock Who's there Cluck Cluck who? Cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck - proceed to bob head and flap wings - cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the low cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy i just had bath salts your face looks tasty!

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knock knock whos there rock rock who rocks dont knock stupid

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What do you call a blonde on anti-joke? Fairly paranoid because of the typical blonde stereotype.

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Three Men walk into a bar. One with a ax and one with a Shovel. The other one isn't holding anything. *Boom* (\ _ /) (x . x)

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Why did the fish but the house Because it wanted to eat the house

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Why did the police officer decide to eat a donut? Because he was slightly hungry, but a meal seemed too much for him.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Who loves George Clooney? George Clooney

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with a road? To get to the other side.

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why did the man throw a stone in the lake? because he'd had a long day at work.

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On a tusday night, three guys walk into a bar After realising they have to work they proceed to exit

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Steal her cookies

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whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

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Yo mamma so crazy She chloroformed a 4 year old and put her in her trunk and no one has ever heard of her since.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because at some point through out the day, it had been relocated to the other side of the road. Since it was feeding time, it needed to return to the chicken coop or else risk death due to starvation.

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? It isn't numbers are not sentiment objects therefore incapable of feeling fear

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why did the baby fall out of the tree? the monkey dropped it. why did the monkey drop the baby? it was dead.

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How did the marines cross the minefield safely at night? Under a full moon

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch some water , jill ended up bending over and jack ended up touching a blue waffle

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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