what is a mix of a bull dog and a shih tzu. a bread of dog that has a shaggy face and long hair

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"MR PLATT!!!!!!" "Yeah?" "Telephone for you sir." "Oh, cheers Tony."

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

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Why did the boy go to his room? Because his father told him to.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog with no legs

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Whats Black and White and Red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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What Did The Farmer When He Lost His Tractor? "Wheres my Tracto?"

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I forgot what i was gonna say

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Q: What did Nala say to Simba during the stampede? A: Nothing. She was nowhere to be found during that scene.

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Q. How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A. That obviously depends on the size of the bathtub and each individual infant.

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Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

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What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

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How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

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why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

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What did the blind man say to the train conductor? Nothing. He was mute too.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

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A man walked into a bar, therefore beginning a lifetime of alcoholism that would slowly tear his family apart.

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I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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Q: What do a dead cat and a flower have in common. A: Nothing, just go away.

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Your mom is over the average weight for a person of here height and age.

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Ellen: Knock knock Steve: Who's there? Ellen: Banana Steve: Banana who? Ellen is offline and can't receive messages right now.

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How did the Jewish husband and stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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