Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the guy coverd in garbage. I don't know but their are a lot of homeless people that can't afford the good stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Guess who thinks your pretty? Hellen Keller

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A ginger kid, a blonde kid and a brunette jump off a 50 foot building... All of them die apart from all of them because luckily there was a swimming pool at the bottom

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A girl walks into a bar and the bartender says, "why is your face so tan?" And she replies "I just got back from the beach."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock knock, Whos there? Your adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino. It just isn't relephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between Wayne Gretzky and Courtney Love? They have different proffesions

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks into a bar. He has a beer and then goes home.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Paul Walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: No

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Where do babies come from? My sex dungeon

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's purple and smells like crap? Crap. I lied about the purple

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. What's worse than that? Hearing that joke a million times on this site.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's black and white and red all over? My dog after she was hit by a car (true story)

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops