Roses are red Violets are blue I have a short term memory Roses are red

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

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three people walked into a bar and there was a blackman,a jew,a white man and a nazi bartendor which ones did he shoot? The black and the jew and the white man

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What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A Coffin.

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A dog is always in the pushup position.

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Refrigerator

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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I saw my friend stabbing a girl. i asked what is he doing "Oh im just killing time" turns out the girls name is Time Demson. What a weird name i thought to myself.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This is an antijoke It doesn't have to rhyme.

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

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What do you call a chicken? You say bawk bawk bawk bawk cockadoodledoo

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What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

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"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

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You have friends

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What do you call a man running away from the bus? A man

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What smells like satans pubic hair and dresses like a woman? Vinny Trolia

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Why was Yabba annoyed? Because the idiots who do the audio description voiceover for Timmy Time on BBC iPlayer frequently refer to her as a male even though she is clearly a female duck.

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what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

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Whats the difference between a frog?

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What is 6 1/2 inches when erected? My penis.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9. Why was 7 afraid of 9? Because 9 was black.

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this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

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Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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