what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

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Did you know that Helen Keller had a swing set? neither did she.

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Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

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When would you find a Mexican, Asian, Black and white guy hanging out? Never

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

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What do you call a black guy who walks into your house and takes your stuff. A repoman, pay your taxes next time

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What do astronauts and Wayne Rooney have in common? I don't know. Ok.

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I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped six's mom.

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

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Q: why did Suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzy.

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DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Who didn't let the gorilla into the ballet? The people who were in charge of that decision.

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

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seek beauty

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Why doesn't anybody like the octopus? There anti-social creatures by nature

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I take my cleats off when I jump on trampolines

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops