- Anti Joke

What do you call a dumb friend? Sam.

whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob. What do you call a man with no arms or legs in front of your door? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms or legs hanging on your wall? Art.

Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

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What's worse then the Boston bombing? The Texas bombing, considering Texas is a much bigger region then Boston.

A man in an airport asked me if i wanted my bag to be carry-on. So i said yes.

Jesus walks on water, Humans are 70% water, I can walk on humans, Therefore i am 70% Jesus.

Why did apple fall off the tree? Because Sally was holding on for dear life and she grab the apple. The apple was still in good condition; Sally however, not so good.

what do you call a black man in the dark? missing.

We're no strangers to love You know the rules and so do I A full commitment's what I'm thinking of You wouldn't get this from any other guy I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you We've known each other for so long Your heart's been aching, but You're too shy to say it Inside, we both know what's been going on We know the game and we're gonna play it And if you ask me how I'm feeling Don't tell me you're too blind to see Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you (Ooh, give you up) (Ooh, give you up) Never gonna give, never gonna give (Give you up) Never gonna give, never gonna give (Give you up) We've known each other for so long Your heart's been aching, but You're too shy to say it Inside, we both know what's been going on We know the game and we're gonna play it I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

How do you kill a blonde? Pull the pin and throw it back...then proceed to paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

Yeah I am sure nobody understood that one... Just be careful in the future. Besides you are supposed to link your "Moral" to the Solvemedia, I suggest you do not post, until you understand things further, I only suggest, but you know that if you become exposed or a threat towards outstanding forces, you become a threat to us all, to our and your fundation, this will not be tolerated unless your desire is to destroy your on fundation, if so, you risk that the desire of the entire fundation, is to destroy you, something which I of course will allow, as I am the leader, not the boss, I do not create nor enforce rules, only guidelines. Moral the friendly neighborhood R*pist: "being new, is no excuse to risk exposing shadows to the light"

Alister Darling plucks his eyebrows.

What's got eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs head.

Once a upon a time there were three kittens that die, the end :D

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate your mom.

Black people are the scum of the earth

Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

Q: What was the name of the armless elf in Snow White? A: Stumpy

Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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