A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Trayvon Martin and George Zimmerman.

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Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

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What's the difference between a 7 year old boy and a 50 year old man? Hair.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

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Do you like cheese? Yes. Okay.

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What does water taste like? Water

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

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Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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69

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you: your adopted me: i was so thanks for saying you ass

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How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

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That awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it would.

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why were the girls confused? they were in a logic class and couldn't seem to find the irrationality chapter in the book

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I just flew in from Seattle, and boy is their airport difficult to navigate.

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

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Your mamas so poor she cant even afford to support a family

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Is that your face or is your dog walking backwards.

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why am I who i am, and you are who you are? dick spice

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I drive a 'rarri

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What trees do fortune tellers look at? Whichever variety of species are indigenous to where they live.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

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the little boy got in a ice cream truck he cant sit down anymore

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An Asian couple walks into a bar, orders a few drinks, pays, and leaves

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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