What did the toilet say when I pooped in it Nothing I just crapped in it

thumb_up thumb_down -21

2 Penises

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Lucy laughed at the joke. Then realised she had gangrene.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the Muslim suicide bomber commit suicide? He was nervous and didn't think he could hijack a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Do you need a life...? You can borrow mine! lol JUBIE! :()

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A horse finds himself sleeping in the ocean. Immediately, he decides to be a dolphin.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

In an apartment complex, a black family lived on the first floor, a mexican family lived on the second floor, and a white family lived on the third floor. Suddenly, at about noon on tuseday, a giant tornado came through town and took out the entire complex, destroying everything. Why did only the white familey survive the catastophy? Because both parents were at work and the kids were in school.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the ocean say to the other ocean? - nothing oceans are inanimate objects that are incapable of talking.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What happened to the guy that took to many lunesta pills? He fell asleep but he was glad it was the weekend or he would have been late for his job

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you get 100 Jews into a car? You can't. It's physically impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Yo mama's so fat she needed a toilet that had a bigger seat (just like me)

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Hey, did you guys hear what happened the Steve Jobs? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock Knock Who's there? 20 20 Who? 24

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Doctor doctor, I feel like listening to good music. Looks like you need "The Cure" to help with this.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

your mom is so stupid she got raped

thumb_up thumb_down -21

This joke might just be dumb enough for YOU to find funny

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Yo mamma is so fat her blood type is RAGU

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Did you hear about the kidnapping? Well you should be very concerned because he hasn't been found in 4 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man walks into a bard with a politician, an Asian man, and a sailor. They all get drinks and have a good time.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I created darkness. God created the stars. God created the bee. I created the wasp. God created the child. I banged your mother. Moral: Soon my wings of darkness shall destroy your very own star, these words seem empty now, so I will fill them with true meaning and purpose as I will give the same to you the day the sky brightens no more.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was the jew crying? He just found out his newborn baby had twenty minutes to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops