I need to start studying.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

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What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

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In my eyes Nero, you are much like a philosopher, the kind which are mocked while they live, and then a couple thousands years later, are recognized as the most intelligent beings of their time.

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How do you feed 1000 people? Cook 1000 meals .

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a turtle walks into a bar and eats everyone

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What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

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Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

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What did he African say when he had diarrhea? Shit

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

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Roses are Gray. Violets are Gray. I am a Dog.

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It said i can write my own joke so i did.

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That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

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Your mother is so nice, I saw her while grocery shopping and we pleasantly chatted. She also remembered my name and invited me to come over sometime and have a snack.

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Where do you study to get a good education? A library, at home, or at another quiet location where it is easy to concentrate.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are unintelligent creatures of instinct, and can tell no significant differences between the pavement and the road. It was unfortunate that a bus was speeding past at the moment this event happened.

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Whats small yellow and cant swim? A short bus full of autistic children.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

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Q. Did you hear about the gay guy that's on the patch? A. yeah, that's a really big step, quitting smoking is tough

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops