Youre mom is so dead...

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How do Asians name their children? They throw them down the stairs and see what sound they make.

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Why was ticklish Tom not ticklish anymore? A: he got hit by a train

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Why did the Japanese man commit suicide? He was terminally ill and decided it was his time to go

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ive got nothing funny to say, so this is what its like to be a woman

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Arrow in the Knee!

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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want to hear a cat joke? i'm just kitten....

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Q: What is the scariest thing ever? A: Child Birth.

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what did the black guy say to the white guy im black

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If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

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What did the clam say to the scuba diver? FUCK MAN! STOP TOUCHING MY JEWELS! WOULD YOU WANT ME TO JUST RIP YOURS AND TAKE THEM WITH ME!

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What do you call a boy with no arm and no legs in a fire? Screwed.

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mental kid

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Why did the man stop going to his local doctor? Because they put highly poisen liquids in the shots

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You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

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HEY WATCH OUT FOR THAT TRUCK! What truck? Weird I could have sworn I saw a truck...

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke. It's not that, my wife and son were just killed in a drunk driving accident.

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1 black guy jumped off a cliff at the same time as a white guy, who fell first? The one who weighed the most.

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what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I take my cleats off when I jump on trampolines

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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