A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

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Once a upon of time, there was a very big kangaroo named Jake. Well one day Jake was eating some food when suddenly a bunch of humans came and saw him. One human name Willie went over to take some pictures of the animal. The Jake ran away.

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Your mother is such a whore that she engages regularly in acts of consensual but unprotected sex with various gentlemen.

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What's the difference between a park bench and a hobo? The park bench can support a family

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this girl and guy were sitting on my couch turns out its my sister and her boyfriend and she just farted

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Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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I came up with one when my friend Sam told me the fortune from her Jone's Soda. A change of heart may lead to a new living environment, a change of heart may also lead to death.

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Q: Why was the mexican mowing the lawn? A: Because the grass was too tall

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I like your hair

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a jew walked into a bar-mitzvah

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I hope the Angels win the pennant No pun intended

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What happens when a llama falls off a cliff? It dies.

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NAACP

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Bags of delicious poop.

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What is the #1 cause of pedophiles? Sexy children

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knock knock no ones home

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What's black and white and red all over? The dead kitten on the road.

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Why did the jewish plumber commit suicide? After years abuse from his alcoholic father and rich sibling, he finally snapped and killed himself on his birthday after nobody told him happy birthday.

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Why Is Helen Keller such a bad driver? Because she is a woman

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What is brown and sounds like a pickle? Poop

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What? Why?

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not your cheese.

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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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Not lying Red, I have my contacts, I am a "facilitator", I pull strings for my employers, and sure the FBI has me on their files, after all we have cooperated with them. Not because I wanted to, but because its my job, and it helps me use the best of my abilities and limited education (I am technically an educated lawyer, and not an agent).

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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