Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have difficulty understanding each other.

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What's the difference between Al Gore and a slab of formica? Many things, most obvious being that Al Gore is a conscious being.

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Why is a frog green? Because it was born that way

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

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Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

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knock knock whos there? nobody

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hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

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How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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Q: what do u call a hotdog that's not cooked? A:a raw hot dog

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What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

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do,Nt loagh at me I has dislecqsia

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There's 2 guys in a Y shaped road. One road leads to a cliff with deadly alligators below the river. The other road leads to the village. You can ask both of the guys one question to which leads to the village. However, one guy always tells the truth and the other guy always tells a lie. How do you get to the village? GPS

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

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A mexican and a black were in a cop car. Who was driving it? The Mexican, he was a cop and the black person was his assistant.

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Yo mamma's so fat, we are all seriously concerned for her health.

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Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

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Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

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I scream You scream The police come It's awkward.

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why was the carrot sad? it was stuck in an antelopes anus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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