whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"Knock, knock." "You don't have to say that. The door's open, come on in."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I violate everyone that do not thumb me green, and vi0late the children, the parents, and the person of those that thumb me red... Its not about the sex, its about the domination... You might even like it...Your kids? Not so much... Well sometimes... Green thumb me, and I will... Meh, then you are awesome... friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Subscribe below, address tracker activated... LETS GO!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two nineteenth century men walk into a bar. Their wives didn't complain, because if they did they'd get hit. hard.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's Black/White and red all over? Obama when he gets a little flustered.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the farmer's wife leave the farm? Because she was a lesbian.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Some jokes rhyme, But this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +11

three blondes are walking along the beach on a desert island, they each have plans to escape. The first swims off the island but is swept in with the current back to land The second blonde burns an SOS into the sand using a rock and twigs-the wind blows it out The third, realising how immature her freinds were, reaches into her pocket and pulls out her mobile phone and begins dialling the coast guard.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the homeless man get for Christmas?... A warm meal, a shower, and a place to sleep courtesy of the local homeless unit.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

There were three brothers. Big, Harry and Dick. They were walking along the road and were all instantly killed by a drunk driver. Their names were never mentioned and their story was used as a promotion for the seriousness of drunk driving and should not be taken lightly.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

thumb_up thumb_down +9

roses arent always red, they can be pink or white. violets are violet, not blue. your pretty lets have sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Bitch your as two-faced as Doduo

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The Christian prayed every night to God for a new bike. He kept it up for a year. Finally, he got a bike for his birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Person 1: Hey how's your day? Person 2: Good Person 1: Cool

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Question: Whats worse then getting hit by a bus? Answer: Getting hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops