Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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how do you stop a bus? Well, just up the road is a stop sign so the bus will stop there because it is illegal to go through a stop sign without stopping.

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What shoots rockets but is not classed as a deadly weapon? A toy rocket launcher, I lied about the rockets.

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(Guys I want to get the most likes so like my joke.) What did the person want. To get the most likes :)

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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What do you get when you mix a baby and a fork? An abortion.

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Q: What do you do when you see a half dead black guy on your front lawn? A: Call the ambulance because he is dying

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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What was the best part of the holocaust? A: none of it, it was a terrible event in history and hopefully is never repeated

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What do an eagle and a badger have in common? They both live underground...except the eagle

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Q:Way C'nt U reed tHis? A: Because im retarted -ian surprenant

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People with cancer.

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Women drivers...

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why is blake oneal gay? because hes black and he likes peniss in his ass

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Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

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What do you call a black man in a Police car? A Police Officer

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Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Why are tootsie rolls brown? because they are....

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Why did the baby fall out the window? Because the parents left the window open by the crib.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

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There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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