A man walks into a bar, purchases a beer, and leaves.

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man: why did the chicken cross the road? other man: why ? man: i don't know, ask him your self. other man: ...

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

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Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

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Why is my penis so damn small? Cause the good lord made me that way

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Well, there's one way...

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What do you get if you put a horse in a blender? Dinner

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Q:How meny jews can u fit in a mini? A:5 in the seats and 1 million in the ashtray.

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Q: Wy couldn't the T-rex grab the other Dinosor? A: Because he is extinct.

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How do you fit a whale into a truck bed? You can't, whales live in the ocean.

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Whats has 6 wheels and can fly? A dumpster, I lied about the flying.

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This statement is false.

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What's worse than reading the same joke multiple times? Having cancer.

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Why did little Lisa fall off the swings? She had no arms

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What did the doctor say to his patient? Doctors are not allowed to give out personal information involving their patients.

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Spongebob: Patrick! Can you hear me? Patrick: No, it's too dark.

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What's black, white and red all over? A cow after slaughter.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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I used to work at a chemical plant manufacturing hydrochloric acid. I couldn't handle it. One day a container exploded and I got severe chemical burns on my face. The scarring is awful. It has ruined my life.

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I always wanted to know what the future will hold in the decades to come... Until I realized the idiotness of my own thought for it is nigh impossible for us humans to see the future... Except... That the ancient Mayan civilization prophesized the end of the universe, which I did take into consideration as I slowly nibbled my way through the waffle cone till I had realized that I had reached the paper surrounding the cone and immediately spat it out for it leaves a fowl taste In my mouth, then continued eating my ice cream as I pondered the future and the anti-climatic ending of this anti-joke.

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A police officer walks into a doughnut shop. He approaches the cashier and hands him 20$. He says "Here, I saw you drop this on your way in" he promptly leaves the store.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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