Little Johnny is sleeping overnight at a school camping trip. The teacher goes around to check tents to make sure everybody is falling asleep fine. Little Johnny, however, says, "Miss, I am scared of the dark. Can I sleep in your tent instead?" The teacher reluctantly agrees, finishes checking around and brings Little Johnny to her tent. "Miss, can I play with your belly button with my finger? My mommy lets me", asks little Johnny. The teacher reluctantly agrees. Suddenly, the teacher jumps up. "THAT WASN'T MY BELLY BUTTON!", she shouts. "Yeah," says Little Johnny. "Well that wasn't my finger, either."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in a van headed to the slaughterhouse.

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Why did the baby die, because he got herpes, so did his mother, there both dead now.

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hey im leon and i love the chuckie

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what's pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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why was the little girl crying in her dads arms? Because he was strangling her

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What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

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What kind of nun would never drink milk? One who suffers from a severe lactose intolerance.

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Q: A black man, A Mexican, And a Asian are in a car. Who Is Driving? A: It depends who is the owner of the car. .

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Why did the man cross the road He didn't, he died after being hit by a car

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why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

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What's worse than getting a flat tire on a date? getting one while rushing your dying grandfather to the hospital.

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What do you call a clock that has no sense of time? .....Broken.

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My computer will die soon, and my life is a lie. Refrigerator.

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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How do you know when a ghost is lying? I don't know because I've never met one, so from personal experience I couldn't tell you.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends. How hard can you throw?

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My dad

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roses are head mydick is blue i live in somolia and i killed all the jews

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How many pieces of gum are in 5 gum? 5. i meen 7

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Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

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I couldnt remember who Rhiana used to date. Then it hit me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops