You know whats funny? Women's rights

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There was a black and a mexican man in a car. Who was driving? None of them; it was the police driving.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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what did a ginger say to god? nothing gingers dont have souls and therefore cant go to heaven

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whats the difference between ur mom and my mom? nothing i slept with both of them

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Whats up with your nan? Copious amounts of lsd

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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What did Ben's Graandma get him for Christmas? Nothing, she died on Thanksgiving!

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Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

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What is a jew in space? Dead

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practice.

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What happens if you play CS:GO? Well you loose alot of fucking money.

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How many batteries does it take to run a car 1 a car battery

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How do you make Chuck Norris cry? Kill his family.

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OK, so there's this blonde driving down the road in her brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 Lamborghini. She's cruisin' about 95, radio blaring, having a great time. She comes up on this trucker who is carrying a double-wide home and is taking up both lanes. To her disliking, he is only going about 45. To get the point across that she wants to get past, she decides to tailgate him. So, she gets to within a foot of his rear bumper. The trucker looks back and sees her on his ass, and motions for her to get off of it, but to her it looks like a wave and she waves back. Since her first attempt was futile, she decided to get a little closer and begin flashing her headlights, hopefully making herself more visible in the process. Once again the trucker sees her on his ass, and this time motions for her to pull over to the side of the road. The trucker steps out of his vehicle with a chunk of chalk and draws a circle three feet in diameter in the middle of the road. He instructs her not to move until he tells her to. Naive as she was, she agrees to it and steps inside it. The trucker goes back to his truck and pulls out a 50-ounce Louisville Slugger. He walks over to the Lamborghini and beats it, and beats it, and beats it again. When he is done, all that is left is a brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 pile of metal. Satisfied, he throws the bat in his truck and walks over to the blonde. When he gets there, to his astonishment, she is rolling around on the street laughing hysterically. He asks her, "Why are you laughing? I just beat the crap out of your car!!" She is laughing too hard to respond, but between giggles he can make out, "While you weren't looking I stepped out of the circle."

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Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

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Q: What do you call a guy that is smart? A: A SMART Guy.

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

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Black people being friendly.

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what do you call dominic rolling down a hill?

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He looks it up first to make sure he's got it right before dialing.

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Why didn't the lolipop taste like anything to the boy beacuse he was aborted

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it smells like up dog in here. whats that?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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